Lucottos: 9.20.09 // Philemon 8-11, Connecting through Forgiveness (Sticking with the Basics)

In keeping with the text arrangement of O.S. Hawkins, let’s read Philemon verses 8-11.

Phm 1:8 Therefore, though I might be very bold in Christ to command you what is fitting,
Phm 1:9 yet for love's sake I rather appeal to you—being such a one as Paul, the aged, and now also a prisoner of Jesus Christ—
Phm 1:10 I appeal to you for my son Onesimus, whom I have begotten while in my chains,
Phm 1:11 who once was unprofitable to you, but now is profitable to you and to me.

Never is the word forgiveness mentioned in the epistle to Philemon, but the letter is all about forgiveness. We see a similar idea in the book of Esther where God is never mentioned, but you see the providence of God all through it!

This is a very delicate matter. Onesimus returning to Colossae required great courage and faith in God on his part. He was a fellow believer in Paul’s eyes but still an unbeliever, a fugitive and a thief in Philemon’s eyes at this point. Slaves had no rights according to Roman law. So verse 8 is pivotal here. The Apostle Paul shifts from talking about Philemon and begins to refer to himself (the personal pronoun I is mentioned 4 times in vv. 8-10), before “letting the cat out of the bag,” in verse 10 with the name of Onesimus.

Therefore (v. 8)

It goes without saying, but when we read the word therefore we have to ask ourselves what is it there for? Paul had been genuinely building up Philemon in verses 4-7, patting him on the back, and giving us insight on what kind of person is a forgiver.

He loves the Lord (v. 5).
He loves the brothers (v. 5).
He is sensitive to the body of Christ (v.6).
He seeks to grow in grace intellectually and experientially (v. 6).
He desires to honor Christ (v. 6).
He wants to be a blessing rather than a burden to others (v. 7).

In a word, Philemon was Christ-like in his character and conduct. Because of that, Paul was about to call upon Philemon, whose name means affectionate or one who is kind, to experience the goodness of forgiveness; the capacity that we all share in common if the Holy Spirit lives within us.

We are just five verses away from being asked to forgive somebody who has wronged us. But contained within those four verses nestled between a description of Philemon’s godly character (vv. 4-7) and making a choice of experiencing the goodness of forgiveness in verse 12 and following are at least five rudimentary spiritual truths to recall before the big event. Sticking to the basics involves keeping these truths in mind and applying them as we are called on to forgive someone who has wronged us.

We often lose sight of the basics don’t we? When a ball team starts to falter the coach will instruct the team to stick to the basics, execute the fundamentals. Excellent performance is founded on the fundamentals. We never get away from the basics no matter how advanced the situation. The basics are the pillars of pursuing excellence.

These foundational truths are alluded to by Paul in verse 8-11. They are not going to jump out at you at first. You have to read between the lines and pick out words and phrases here and there to piece this thing together. By sticking to the basics, even in this matter of forgiveness, we can change win/lose, lose/win/, lose/lose, and win/win relationships into win/win/win or Win3. Improve win/win? Isn’t that what we strive for in all our relationships? From the world’s point of view that would be the high road. But when it comes to the kingdom as believers in Christ, we pursue a higher purpose than that.

Win/win may benefit two parties but if the relationship does not promote the cause of Christ, it is only a win/win between men. The world may view win/win as an honorable exchange among men but that is as far as the world can take it. The world does not seek to promote the kingdom of God. Win/win relationships do not automatically equate to a virtuous thing. Two people or two business enterprises can come together and ally their greedy ambitions; and to them it is a win/win, but it is an unhealthy condition to everyone else affected by the relationship.

A relationship that is an “I win, you win, and the Kingdom wins” is a Win3 relationship. There are no ambiguities, no rationalities, only a clearer virtue with a higher purpose to glorify God in the relationship. This should describe our relationships in the body of Christ, Win3. This kind of relationship has God’s values in mind and incorporated on all three sides of the equation. In order to execute this truth, we need to stick to the basics when confronted, for instance, with forgiving someone who has wronged us so that Win/Win/Win becomes a reality in the relationship between believers. What are the basics that support our capacity to forgive? They are found in verses 8-11.

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Basic truth #1: the Word of God is the rule of life – verse 8, Therefore, though I might be very bold in Christ to command you what is fitting,

The prevalence of ignorance of the Bible, widespread willful disobedience, and a free-spirited meism of “it’s on my own time” attitude and behavior among believers reveal the fact that the Word of God is not the rule of life for many who claim that they belong to Christ.

Though I might be very bold – free and fearless confidence, freedom in speaking, plainly, openly.

In Christ the Source of his confidence

To command you Paul has a perfect right to do, free to order Philemon to do his duty. Paul could order Philemon to do it; and Philemon would have obeyed being the godly man that he was. But a believer of such character (vss. 4-7) only needed a hint of Paul’s authority which suggested to Philemon what was the right or proper thing to do – what was fitting. Paul is going there but not going there. You see with godly character, the Apostle Paul doesn’t have to bring out the big guns to force godly men like Philemon in doing what is right or proper when wronged.

Paul knew that love is the greatest motivator (1 Cor 13), not just any kind of love but agape love; God’s kind of love, love that offers the best it has, a love that is sacrificial, and a love that is unconditional. The absences of the word forgive, of a law, of a principle, of a theology, or of biblical texts suggest that Philemon understood the theological basis for forgiveness.

What is fitting what is proper, meeting the requirements

Therefore, though I have enough confidence in Christ to order you to do what is proper, NAS.

Accordingly, though I am bold enough in Christ to command you to do what is required, ESV.

I have the confidence as an Apostle of Jesus Christ to command you to forgive based upon the theology of forgiveness that is mandated by God.

I love this hint of authority. It is something we need to be reminded of when faced with the choice of forgiving someone who has wronged us. No matter how godly or Christ-like we may be, we never stop growing in grace intellectually and experientially, and we need the hint of a higher authority.

Here is the foundation of everything in the life of a believer. The Bible must be the rule of life in all matters pertaining to godliness. This includes forgiveness. Our behavior and response to behavior is governed by the Word of God. That is the bottom line.

If the Word is our rule of life we are going to exercise our capacity to forgive, acknowledging a higher authority in the matter. not as I will, but as You will (Mt 26:39). Remember the Lord’s prayer in Mt 6. There is that one part of the prayer that says, Your will be done On earth as it is in heaven (v. 10). What is Jesus’ expectation of His will to be done on earth? As it is in heaven, fully and willing! The worship of God, the sovereign rule by God, and the performance of His will are all a reality in heaven. These are the expected realities in the kingdom on earth among the brothers.

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Basic truth #2: love is the high road (the road less traveled) – yet for love’s sake I rather appeal to you.

When Paul makes his appeal to love he is making an appeal to agape love (the love God gave to us at salvation) that emanates from the divine nature, not the human nature. This is why we say that forgiveness is not about emotions but obedience to the teachings of Christ. As we have said before in times past, our love for God is measured by our obedience to His Word. Jesus instructed His disciples in Jn 14:15, If you love Me, keep My commandments. How do we show our love for God, by obeying His Word. If we are willing to obey God because of love rather than fear, this is a good indication we are a child of God (cf. Rom 6:17, But God be thanked that though you were slaves of sin, yet you obeyed from the heart that form of doctrine to which you were delivered.). Because Paul and Philemon both shared the love of God poured out into their hearts by the Holy Spirit at salvation (Rom 5:5), they have a love connection, a bond of love.

Our love for God always takes precedent over love for others (cf. Mt 22:36-40, first and second command). When we are right with God we are right with others.

Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another (1 Jn 4:11).

Our love for God always takes priority over a love for things. Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him (1 Jn 2:15).

Forgiveness is about (saving something) making a way where there is no way. For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish (there’s the forgiveness) but have everlasting life (Jn 3:16). God made a way by offering up His only begotten Son.

Why we need to be reminded of this truth is because it helps us with keeping with the basics. Love is the fulfillment of the law, Rom 13:10b. Paul, in what is called the love chapter, in 1 Cor 13 declared that without agape love we are nothing, a big zero; we gain nothing without love. Only love will endure forever.

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Basic truth #3: the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, verse 9b -- being such a one as Paul, the aged, and now also a prisoner of Jesus Christ—

Many commentators view this as a sympathetic appeal to Philemon. When you read this it does play on the emotions particularly since it was Paul who won Philemon to Christ. However, forgiveness, as we mentioned earlier, is not about emotions but obedience.

Paul may have plucked a few heart strings here and there, but the emphasis of alluding to these phrases such as Paul the aged, a prisoner of Jesus Christ, and in my chains (v. 10) serve as a reminder to Philemon and to us that which we seem to easily lose sight of in the daily routines of life – that we are in engaged in a great spiritual warfare, a spiritual conflict. Behind the flesh and blood a battle is raging for the souls of men and for robbing believers of the spiritual blessings God has given them (Eph 1:3), For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly place (Eph 6:12).

In 2 Cor 10:3-5, Paul said, For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh. (4) For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, (5) casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ ….

There is a large satanic campaign waged against the saints. Believers need be to spiritually minded and not employ human methods in fighting the enemy behind the scenes of flesh and blood. The world would tell Philemon to fry Onesimus; the Holy Spirit through Paul says forgive him. There are larger things at stake here than Philemon exercising his legal right. Only in eternity will we see the ripple effect of godly response to God’s will.

Paul, the aged (presubtes) Paul’s exact age is unknown; he is probably around sixty but people’s life span back then was shorter. He was considered old but probably has reference of being older than his years as a result of labor and hardship in his service to Christ.
Paul said in Gal 6:7, I bear in my body the marks of the Lord Jesus.

Read the stirring account in Paul’s own words of his labor and hardships in 2 Cor 11:23ff,

2Co 11:23 Are they ministers of Christ?—I speak as a fool—I am more: in labors more abundant, in stripes above measure, in prisons more frequently, in deaths often.
2Co 11:24 From the Jews five times I received forty stripes minus one. (195 lashes!)
2Co 11:25 Three times I was beaten with rods; once I was stoned; three times I was shipwrecked; a night and a day I have been in the deep;
2Co 11:26 in journeys often, in perils of waters, in perils of robbers, in perils of my own countrymen, in perils of the Gentiles, in perils in the city, in perils in the wilderness, in perils in the sea, in perils among false brethren;
2Co 11:27 in weariness and toil, in sleeplessness often, in hunger and thirst, in fastings often, in cold and nakedness—
2Co 11:28 besides the other things, what comes upon me daily: my deep concern for all the churches.

now also a prisoner of Jesus Christ

Paul was under house arrest in Rome (Acts 28), but he never referred to himself a prisoner of anyone or thing but of Christ. Paul knew there are no victims in Christ for He is the Sovereign Lord. Paul understood in all of his trials that God allows no circumstances to enter our lives without His approval. God made him a prisoner.

in my chains (v. 10)

Paul is probably chained to a Roman soldier. Can you imagine how miserable those Roman soldiers chained to Paul must have been if they refused the gospel offer of salvation! Talk about a captive audience.

These three phrases remind us that Paul was a soldier of Jesus Christ, a seasoned combat veteran of a great spiritual war raging. His main weapon was the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God (Eph 6:17). We must never lose sight of this basic spiritual truth. The threat of terrorism today and the conflicts throughout the world seem surreal at times but unfortunately it’s real alright. We don’t have to look for the enemy, Satan’s forces seek us out. They bring the battle home to us. They are spiritual terrorist. And any breach in security caused by sin, like a heart of unforgiveness, evil forces will hasten the attack without mercy. The power of sin is ruthless and brutal. We must put on the whole armor of God to oppose the enemy (Eph 6).

Unlike the world, the battle is fought with love. Without love we are nothing; there is no gain; there is no victory. Love God, love your neighbor, love the saints, love your enemies! I2P….

2Ti 2:3 You therefore must endure hardship as a good soldier of Jesus Christ.

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Basic truth #4: obedience comes with a price.

· We don’t want to be naïve about this truth. Forgiveness usually has a price tag. Isn’t that what we were taught growing up that our freedom wasn’t free (some body paid for it in blood) and nothing is absolutely free; it had to cost somebody something somewhere.
· For the Father to offer forgiveness to us, it cost Him His Son to provide a way where there was no way (I2P).
· Philemon will have to yield his legal right if he is to forgive Onesimus. He has lost time and money because his slave stole from him and skedaddled to Rome.
· It costs us something to save something.
· This is the price of love; we lose to gain.
· Pride, the most expendable thing, is usually the barrier that hinders forgiveness the most.
· Yes, and all who desire to live godly in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution (2 Tim 3:12).
· …Come, take up the cross, and follow Me (Mk 10:21). As long as we pursue our crosswalk in obedience to Christ, the offense of the cross will never cease (cf. Gal 5:11). Obedience comes with a price.

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Basic truth #5: Only through the power of God can relationships be transformed – verses 10-11, I appeal to you for my son Onesimus, whom I have begotten while in my chains, (11) who once was unprofitable to you, but now is profitable to you and to me.

· The name of Onesimus had to hit Philemon between the eyes! You are kidding me, right? Onesimus!? In the original Onesimus appears at the end of verse 10 – “I appeal to you for my son whom I have begotten while in my chains, Onesimus.” Bam!

· How do we know that Onesimus had repented?

i. Onesimus returned with Tychicus to Colossae to Philemon’s home. Under Roman law the slave had no rights. Onesimus’ life was in Philemon’s hands. Talk about courage and faith in God for a new convert!
ii. He was transformed (v. 11). Paul uses a play on words with Onesimus’ name which means useful. Useful (euchrēstos) who once was useless (achrēstos), but now is useful. But now suggest a change resulting from his new birth. When there was no way God made a way, but now.

iii. He was proven faithful (v. 12-13, Col 4:9, Onesimus, a faithful and beloved brother).

· My son (cf. 1 Tim 1:2; Titus 1:4)

You see God wasn’t appealing through the Apostle Paul to Philemon to do what He hasn’t already done for Philemon. God asks of us to forgive because He forgave us. It’s that simple. Our pride plus demonic influence exacerbate the conditions for forgiveness to happen.

Though forgiveness is commanded, God appeals to our will in love for us to offer those who have wronged us with the same forgiveness shown to us. When God forgave us of our sins, did not the forgiveness change our lives from darkness to light; from hell to heaven, from slaves of sin to sons of God, from insignificance to significance?

We have the capacity to forgive one another because of the Holy Spirit living within us. As believers, forgiving someone who wronged us actually changes or transforms us into Christ-likeness! We must rely on the power of God to transform us then others.

Whenever a believer loses in a relationship with another believer, the relationship is lose/lose/lose. I lose, you lose, the kingdom suffers loss. Why does a lack of forgiveness have such a foothold in the kingdom? I will quickly suggest at least five reasons. Lose/lose/lose is promoted by this kind of environment below.

The Word of God is not the rule of life; self is.
Love is not the high road, our rights are.
Believers are entangled in the affairs of the world. 2Ti 2:4, No one engaged in warfare entangles himself with the affairs of this life, that he may please him who enlisted him as a soldier. Making a living is more important than living for Christ, no time for worship, prayer, devotion, growth, fellowship, sharing our faith, et cetera.
Unwilling to pay the price of obedience. We are offended by the crosswalk.
A disregard for the spiritual welfare of others. No reliance upon God to change us or others. We take matters in our own hands to make things right.

By sticking to the basics in this matter of forgiveness we transform win/lose, lose/win/, lose/lose, and win/win relationships into Win/Win/Win (or Win3). We win, they win, and the Kingdom wins. That’s I2P.

In order for believers to have a right relationship with one another it must be a Win3 relationship. We must never lose sight or stray away from that truth. Kingdom matters matter. Forgiveness is a natural part of kingdom living in a sinful world. We need to stick to the basics when it comes to forgiveness. The circumstances may be simple or complex in nature, but if the kingdom loses, the relationship loses all the way around. Win/Lose/Lose, Lose/Win/Lose, Win/Win/Lose equals Lose in the kingdom -- Lose/Lose/Lose. We must always stick with the basics.